Unfortunately, we can only see ourselves reflected in a mirror, but it’s important to remember that who we really are comes from inside ourselves, not from what’s seen on the surface. If you’re feeling in need of change, or even some new career opportunities, maybe today is the day to start painting a new self-portrait.
How do most people go about gauging their own image? We look through the eyes of others. What they see and interpret shapes who we are and who we will be. I’m sure you’ll agree; there’s something most definitely wrong with that picture.
Let’s think about this for a moment. Everything which we are originates from within ourselves. Our brain retains all kinds of memories from our past. Our body somehow retains our learned movements, such as running or swimming. An emotional tag is also attached to each of these events. There isn’t any conceivable way that another person could have unlimited access to these personally understood qualities. With that being the case, how can they look at us from the outside and then decide what we’re all about? It just doesn’t make any sense. What we project to others comes from who and what we see ourselves to actually be. If an individual doesn’t like this, for whatever reason, then they’re rejecting us based on an assumption.
Rejection is painful, but it isn’t only our pain to bear, as the pain also belongs to the other person as well. If they have a problem with what they see in us, they may have such a problem in themselves. We tend to criticise in others the very traits that we have ourselves. That’s how the green-eyed monster works.
It is true that sometimes we can have character traits that rub people the wrong way. If you’re too blunt or too indecisive, people may tend to shy away from you. Someone pointing this out will do so from a place of love, not criticism. They want the best for you, so they take the time to help. That is in sharp contrast to someone whose words cut deep when they are supposed to be “saying it for your own good.”
As humans, we were created to grow and evolve. Part of growth is realizing characteristics that we don’t need any more and letting go of them. It’s okay to take control and reinvent yourself, as long as you are doing it for your benefit - not someone else’s.
In life we meet very few genuine people. We are usually suspicious of them because we often hide behind a mask ourselves. It’s refreshing to know that there are people in this world who are not afraid to accept themselves, flaws and all. These individuals could easily teach us a thing or two about painting our own self-portrait.
Alan Gillies is the CEO of Learning 2 Live, a comprehensive online Lifestyles resource which delves deeply into business and pleasure, covering a wide variety of Lifestyle subjects such as Relationships, Health, Wellbeing, Career, Travel & Coaching, and many more. Alan has considerable personal experience throughout a number of business fields including Coaching and Mentoring, Change Management and Neuro Linguistic Programming.
Posted on September 29th, 2009 by Admin
Filed under: Self Help and Motivational
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